"I just graduated college and am feeling really down. I thought this would be an exciting time in my life, but I just feel lost." - 22, F, NY Transitioning from college to the next phase of life is a big step, and it's not uncommon to feel lost and overwhelmed. After all, school is typically a structured environment with a "roadmap." You've gone from elementary school to middle school, middle school to high school, and high school to college. But now, there's no longer a mapped out "next step." And that's scary! First, take a moment to practice self-compassion by realizing that any fear you're experiencing is completely normal. Second, give yourself permission to both mourn and celebrate the end of this life chapter. Reflect on the positive aspects of your college experience and the lessons learned. Third, embrace uncertainty as an opportunity for growth and self-discovery. Be patient and kind to yourself, and give yourself permission to not have it all figured out right away. 

"I know I have anxiety, but I don't really understand what that means. How is this different from any other stress?" - 29, F, NY Although stress and anxiety can feel similar, the difference is really in the cause. Stress is a response to an external trigger (such as a tight work deadline), and the feeling passes once the stressor is gone. Anxiety, on the other hand, is pervasive. It's a consistent feeling of dread or fearfulness, even when there is no external threat. Therefore, the cause of anxiety is more internal. Anxiety disorders are among the most common mental health issues, and there are many different ways in which anxiety can manifest. Generalized anxiety disorder (GAD) is characterized by excessive and persistent worry about everyday events and activities. Social anxiety disorder is characterized by intense fear or anxiety in social situations, such as public speaking or meeting new people. Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) is another type of anxiety disorder that involves recurring, intrusive thoughts or images (obsessions) that lead to repetitive behaviors or mental acts (compulsions). Although I don't believe in pathologizing clients, understanding the type of anxiety disorder you have can be helpful in validating your experience and letting you know you're not alone in your struggles. It can also help direct you towards the right coping strategies and therapeutic tactics for your specific needs.

"I’m too embarrassed to tell my family, friends, and partner that I’m in therapy, but I feel like I’m lying to the people I care about. What do I do?" - 21, M, NY Although therapy is becoming gradually less stigmatized, there is certainly still a lot of societal shame around getting professional help for mental health issues. And depending on other factors, such as race, ethnicity, religious background, and/or gender (just to name a few), that shame can feel even more intense. Therapy is personal and private, and there is nothing wrong with keeping it that way. That said, there can be benefits to being vulnerable and honest with the people you love and trust. I would first suggest asking yourself: is my fear of judgment a form of projection? In other words, am I assuming others will judge me harshly because I am judging myself harshly? Going inward and examining the shame you yourself carry can be a good place to start. I would also strongly encourage you to talk to your therapist about this. That is what we are here for! Your therapist can help you unpack the embarrassment you feel and help you determine what next steps make the most sense for you. Finally, remember that seeking help is a sign of strength and resilience, not weakness. It takes courage to ask for help, especially when we are afraid we’ll be met with judgment or criticism. Don't forget to be proud of yourself for taking your wellbeing into your own hands.